Answers

For the past several months, I've been asked a lot of questions. Questions that I didn't have good answers at first thought. Questions on why I loved my fellowship so much. Questions on why I felt so blessed in the new community that God has given me. And I struggled to answer these questions because there was just so much. In the span of about 2-3 months, the people I knew and were good friends with shifted, starting last June...

I think it began when I felt God telling me to move on. Last summer, after a Turkey missions trip I went on a with a high school and college performing arts evangelism group, I felt like it was time to move on. For the last couple of years, I've invested a lot of my time in high schoolers along with several other college and graduate students. And after the season finally ended during the completion of the missions trip, I was pretty relieved that it was finally over. I was excited to start a new part of my life. I missed being with people that I could relate to. At the same time, the current fellowship I was attending was much more of a young adult group. I have faithfully attended when I could, even though the majority of the fellowship was already working. I didn't find much of a community there.

A prayer group that miraculously started over the beginning of summer started to get me thinking. It was unique because it was a group of friends that I didn't know particularly well at all. Most of them I didn't know prior. But I feel this was the beginning of me coming to a realization that there was so much more. That more than just reading a chapter or two in my Bible each night. Praying before meals and through out the day, God wants to have an intimate relationship with me. And that there is power every time I bow my head bend my knees in worship and prayer before God - that the all-powerful, living God is listening to little me.

And when you come to this revelation, the Sunday-morning-church perspective just doesn't work anymore. There is a hunger for so much more. A craving to worship, to pray, for His word. The so called "radical" Christianity isn't so much radical anymore. The need for spirit-filled heartfelt worship, either alone or as a group is so much more than just those 30 minutes at church, but rather a lifestyle. Even the disciplines that I once thought were overly religious or for only hardcore Christians didn't seem so hardcore anymore. Fasting for example be one. While I've fasted for homework assignments or for special circumstances before - God has always come through and did work in my heart. I can only imagine what it would be like if fasting was something done regular to consecrate ourselves as living sacrifices to God. And this revelation was emphasized at Onething when Misty Edwards said that the only response to knowing God's love is 24/7 worship and prayer.

And I'm mentioning all of this because it's how I've changed from being a part of a new community. It's so much easier when there's a same hunger for Jesus, that same passion. When everyone is excited for the next prayer gathering, when regular hangouts turn into worship sessions. When Jesus and what He's done in our lives the topic of every conversation. It's so much easier to consecrate our lives when we know there are brothers and sisters right along you, going through that same struggle. When brothers and sisters text and message you consistently to ask and give prayer or to pray through webcam. When you know that there are people interceding for each other. I can go on and on - but the main thing is, I see how their love and hunger for Jesus has changed them, and I can't help but want the same thing. These brothers and sisters are so exhorting and edifying. I'm so blessed.